So here I am sitting in the family room trying to not be so angry. Or maybe trying to figure out what I am so angry about. It’s been one of those days, maybe one of those weeks, hell maybe it’s been a whole month. And I know that most of us don’t like to broadcast our bad days, but sometimes we need to. This is not a husband bashing post. A kid bashing post or anything like that. It is simply a mom and wife who is tired. Angry. Aggravated. And just put out. Yes, I have a lot to be thankful for. Yes, my problems are minimal to most. And yes, I love my husband and kids more than anything. But I also have bad days.
Long story short, I am just in a bad mood. I may be sick, who knows why my nose is clogged so badly I have to breath through my mouth, which I hate. My head is pounding. And I am just hungry but nothing sounds good! Little annoyances add up and it gets over whelming. Like the fact last night the neighbors cows and massive black angus bull got on to our property and was running our baby colt. So I had to figure out how to get my horses into another field but not let the huge bull and 15 heifers that were with him in that field. I had to do all this alone at 11:30 at night because my husband works nights. And everything seems to happen at night, when I have no help from another adult. Never fails. We have a nice calm day and then the sun sets and all hell breaks loose!
And tonight while having all the kids take baths and showers Griffin yells for me that water is coming out from under the toilet. That then becomes the toilet won’t refill. The shower is now filling up with nasty black water from the drain. Oh, and guess what, the bath tub won’t drain. So now I am plunging the toilet, shower, and Jacuzzi tub all the while each time I plunge down black water comes back up, possibly with food mixed in. Oh yes, I remember telling Matt over a month ago that pipes in the kitchen needed cleaned out because the sink was draining slow. So now it’s all backed up in the shower. Awesome. After just standing and staring at the black food water in the bottom of the shower unsure of what to do at this point, I decide to get the 3 year-old ready for bed, but not before getting his antibiotic because did I mention he got attacked by our rooster over the weekend? Yea, black eye, puncture in the back of the head, puncture on his cheek, scratches all down his arms, back and face. And on that day we also found an abandoned kitten we have been bottle feeding every 3 hours like a newborn. Then add in laundry, home school, grocery shopping, bill paying and budgeting, animal care, and anything else I need to take care of and I am just mad.
Am I too blessed to be stressed? Absolutely, does that mean I am not? Nope, it doesn’t. It means that I am tired of asking my husband to do things and having to wait weeks to get it done. And having to ask my kids to do the same things every day. Yes, the animals need fed everyday, yes you have to do school, please finish your chores, etc. And making stupid phone calls to the trash company because for the 5th week in a row they haven’t replaced the trashcan they broke. Or anything else that a stay at home mom has to do to keep the household running. Does it mean I am not blessed, no it means I am human. So listen up mamas, we all have those days. Days when we don’t want to do another thing for another person. Why should we? No one does anything for us, right? I know that voice in your head. I hear it too, quite often. So instead of making myself feel even worse by telling myself to just get over it, I am going to accept these feelings tonight. I am in a bad mood and that’s ok. I will go to sleep and start over again tomorrow. Will I be happy tomorrow, I don’t know yet. I may end up being like Ouiser and just be in a bad mood for 40 years!